WHY I GAVE UP MY ITALIAN RESIDENCY AFTER 7 YEARS
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How Could I let it go?
Why would someone willingly relinquish their Italian residency after 7 years? After learning a new language, making a home and new friends, and overcoming obstacle after obstacle? Let me explain ☺️
In April 2017, I moved to Southern Italy with my two big rescue dogs, Sweetie Pie and Mack. It was a big decision that I had dreamed about for 30 years. At 54, I left a stressful but rewarding career, sold all my belongings in the US, moved to a small village in the mountains, and bought a 500-year-old house that needed total renovation. And then, I decided it would be a good idea to purchase another property to renovate! Believe me, I doubted my sanity often 🙃
“I had NEVER considered giving up my Italian residency until some life changes made me reconsider everything. I was having a meltdown just thinking about it and my mind was racing when considering what it would mean for my future. My only home is here in Italy, my life is here, and it’s where I feel comfortable and at peace. I had worked hard to get where I was so why would I throw it away?”
The main reasons for my decision to make this change were the infamous Italian bureaucracy, the passing of my elderly dogs within a year of each other, and, most importantly, my family in the States and Asia. Individually, none of these reasons would have been enough to do it, but the combination of all of them did.
So let’s get into each one
The infamous ITALIAN BUREACRACY What you’ve heard about the bureaucracy in Italy is not an exaggeration or a myth. After seven years, it had taken its toll on me. I longed for a year, a month, or a few weeks, without paperwork, delays, lack of information, and unexpected changes. I vaguely remembered my almost paperless life so many years ago 🗄️
PERMESSO DI SOGGIORNO (Permit to Stay) The immigration office was making it more difficult to renew and the wait was endless. Not knowing what would change or be required every few years made planning for the future almost impossible. My application had always been approved and I had no doubt it would have been again. I was even eligible to apply for a Permanent Residency The issue was more about what I wanted for my future, at least for now
“A Permesso di Soggiorno or Permit to Stay allows you to stay in the country year-round without travel restrictions. Without a Permesso or “residency” as many call it, you are restricted to 90 days out of every 180 days in the Schengen area, which Italy is one”
ITALIAN TAXES I could never get a handle on what I could expect to pay even after consulting with numerous commercialistas (accountants). It wasn’t getting easier or more clear even after several years. My tax bill changed year-to-year even if my taxable amount did not. Note: This is for worldwide holdings or wealth tax for foreign residents only, not Italian income tax which I have none. This made it frustrating to budget and caused a lot of anxiety
GRIEF My two best friends, Sweetie Pie and Mack, who made the move with me to Italy, passed away within a year of each other. The grief and loss had a big impact on me. They had given me so much comfort in a new land where life can feel overwhelming, especially as a single woman. We took road trips all over Italy, they learned Italian faster than I did 🫠, and were amazing bully breed ambassadors here in my village
RENOVATIONS I finally finished renovating my properties - two connected apartments and a mountain cabin with land. Would I do it again? Probably not, but invaluable lessons were learned. I’d renovated homes back in the States and it’s never easy, but try doing it in a small village with limited workers, a new language, and many non-working holidays. Exhausting
EMOTIONALLY TIRED I was feeling stagnant and locked in after several years
First, there was the Covid lockdown which like other places was very restrictive and difficult here in 🇮🇹
Caring for my elderly dogs, one who had gone blind and deaf and the other very large, was making it impossible to travel far or find proper medical care for them. And knowing that their time with me wasn’t long, changed my outlook on my future
Long, cold, and wet winters were taking their toll on me. It takes a lot to keep these ancient stone homes warm and dry in the winter and early spring
Living in a small mountain village can feel isolating after some time. I grew up in a small town but moved to San Francisco, then Oakland, right after high school and had only lived in larger cities until this move
FAMILY The MOST important factor was missing my family in the States and Asia. I was starting to feel disconnected from them by the lack of actual time spent together. My grandkids were getting older and I wanted to be in their lives more. My sons have hectic jobs as coaches and are often on the road. Asking them to travel to Italy during their limited time off isn’t practical and it’s expensive, So at least for the next several years until the grandkids are older, I will travel to them when I can
Wow! When I see this list now, I get it. Until I started writing it all out, I hadn’t added up everything I had experienced in those seven years. And I’ve left out some personal issues that we won’t get into - yet!
“Keep in mind that these are only MY experiences. There are many things I could have done differently and better, but I am a big believer that you grow from the lessons that life hands you. I’m extremely grateful for everything I learned and feel more confident in almost every aspect of my life. This new confidence helped me decide to give up the residency and stop worrying about the future ”
Along with gratitude, I believe it’s important to keep track of your wins and accomplishments in life, no matter how small. Because of everything I’ve experienced, I’ve grown in numerous ways and am no longer the person who left the States seven years ago. Some of mine are that I:
Learned a new language and can even understand some local dialect
Became an Italian food snob 😏 You really can’t help it when you live in Campania, known for their fresh & delicious food
Emotionally decompressed after years of the career grind in the States and just general life. All aspects of my health improved & I learned to slow down and appreciate the simple things
Drive without being terrified in most cities in Italy, even Napoli! Almost always 😬
Know the meaning of most Italian hand gestures 🤌🏼
Can assist on any home project you might have 🛠️
Explored solo in my Green Machine all over Italy and got lost more times than I can count 🚙
Have a deep appreciation of Italian people and culture, and will argue against any stereotypes of Southern Italians ❤️
How could I leave such a beautiful and special place? Well, I’m not really. And it’s not as drastic as it sounds even though initially it scared me to death. I may even re-apply for Italian residency in a few years, who knows? It was time for a break from it all. Travel, visiting my kids and grandkids, and seeing if somewhere else captures my heart, were calling me. I finally stopped reacting and started listening to my intuition. That’s when a lot of the stress melted away
“So what did I do after going to the Municipio (City Hall) and signing that single piece of paper releasing my Italian residency?”
I spent nearly 6 months visiting my family in the United States, Mexico, and Indonesia, with intermittent trips back to Italy. I had been considering Mexico as a possible place for residency since it's close to my home state of California, and my son and grandkids in Texas. Having grown up in California, Mexico feels like a sister country. Did I end up getting Mexican residency?
That's a story for Part 2... 😉 🇲🇽
One of the reasons I wanted to share this with you is to be transparent about the realities of life in Italy. I didn’t come to Italy with an Italian husband/boyfriend, family ties, or a job. Coming to Italy solo is a completely different experience. You’ll need lots of willpower, a bit of crazy, being open to change, patience, and then more patience. And always humor!
If you are considering a move to Italy permanently or part-time, I hope this post helps you. I am working on a vlog series based on my experiences through the years: the good, the bad, and the meh
